Hey Y'all. Check out my page INAHOM. I have updated it. Though I have a lot more to put on it. (only a hundred or two.) And am almost done shutting down this page. Yayy me! So please check it out. I think i said my new page is something else. Well, I was wrong. It is INAHOM. lol. SEE YOU GUYS SOON!

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I am shutting down this page and starting all over. No more deviations, or anything else will be submitted on this page. My new page will be up and funning in early July. Just in time for Independence day. my new page is Ladyjayspeaks. Check you there.

-JAY says CIao.

Monday, February 04, 2008


Dear Ms. Heidi-Lee De Mello,

Today, I had received your letter in regards of not attending IADT for January. In it’s contents you had stated that “you understand that changes in my personal, financial, or work situation may have delayed me from pursuing this opportunity.” Truth is, I am not sure that you do. And though it may not matter to you, to me it matters you at least have the opportunity to understand my situation.


In high school, I had many difficulties. Instead of facing them head-on I ran away from them, got my diploma, and joined the United States Air Force. I was in the military for little over a year when my term ended abruptly for me; had caught up with me and sent me to the hospital for more than a month. I had to learn that being raped doesn’t mean you have to be a victim your whole life; and wishing for things like cancer to hit me so I don’t have to deal with the worlds issues. I had to rebuild myself because I had lived behind walls to scared to let anyone in or myself out. I had to learn the hard way to not take anything for granted: a bite of a little Debbie brownie, a whiff of a fresh breeze, the words of someone saying “Thank you”, all of which have brought me to tears.


I wasn’t prepared for this to happen to me. Penniless and broken I had only one place to go, my mothers. After six years of not living with her she opened her home and heart to me. In gratitude, I decided to help her out as much as possible. She had just given birth to a beautiful baby boy named Ben (19 years my junior) and was stuck in unemployment because of her C-Section and the failing job market in this very small area. Things had grown progressively worse and they went into major debt. Not having any money, I did the best I could and took on the responsibility of taking care of all six members of the family, not counting the three dogs and two turtles. Inevitably I became an unpaid nanny, maid, mediator, and strangely the one to give optimism to them. The least I could do for my mother, who took me in when no one else would, was look past my severe anxiety, my horrible depression, my irate borderline, my stress induced blackouts, and ever continuing fears to take care of those who really need it.


About six months have past since I was taken in and finally their lives are getting better, slowly. Yet, I am here on the verge of cabin fever, yearning to do something with myself and my life. Keeping me most sane is my art, passion, and drive for survival. Something’s I never had a seen in myself before. But now that I do I want/need to go on and start school, to restart my life. I had convinced my grandmother to help me with enrollment and application fee’s. She had given my 125 dollars for Christmas/Birth-day to help me out, though like mom she couldn’t really afford it.


College is a dream of mine, has been since I was little. Problem is that 125 dollars do not cover my enrollment, application, books, class utensils, lab fees, food, and housing. I know as soon as I get started I can get a job and get loans for application. But I don’t have the means to start. I have seen your commercials, checked out your website, read your pamphlets. I yearn to be apart of what you have to offer and I would be willing to do anything to do just that. (Anything legal and ethical of course) I would do janitorial work, administrative work, organize school projects and fundraisers, and draw murals to help morale. I would do Anything. I have the heart, passion, talent, and drive to make your school proud.


But Ms. Heidi-Lee De Mello, you and I know just having those things and going through many self accomplishments do not get you into school. No, scholarships, helping hands, and money help you get into school. I have no scholarships, my mom and grandmother have done all that they can do and 125 dollars is all I have money wise. So I just sit hear wishing that I could be in your January or even April classes. You do me honor reading my story and it is truly appreciated.

Sincerely,
Mischa J Hampton
-19 years old

I am contiplating moving back to MadTown for a while. At least till I get my degree. I don't know. I have to find a roomate, a job and I have a ride up there. What are your thoughts on it?

Do you love life?